The Last Straw

Prava was cooking breakfast in the kitchen while her husband Ranit waited calmly. She was still wearing her night gown while he was fully dressed for office. The clamour of the utensils in the kitchen contrasted the quiet at the dining table.

Shrimp pasta in white sauce with garlic bread was served along with a glass of fresh orange juice. Ranit put away his phone; his movements a bit too rushed to go unnoticed. And he tried too hard to focus on his breakfast.

Prava sighed to herself. They have been married for 9 long years and she suddenly longed for the early days of their marriage when her burnt toast elicited the happiest of the smiles from Ranit. She sat on the other side of the table pretending to look at the newsfeed in her phone while Ranit busied himself with the meal.

Ranit got up when he was done and waved a polite goodbye before leaving. As Prava watched him through the window driving the car towards the big complex gate her heart seemed to break from the weight of pain and she let out some of it by shedding copious tears.

Another day when her husband did not make any attempt to start a conversation. Another day when he was absolutely indifferent to her unrest. Another day when she spotted him trying to hide the phone when she walked in.

Prava had tried to ignore the line of thought that Ranit’s behavior nowadays encouraged. All the signs were clearly pointing to the presence of another female in her husband’s life. But she desperately wanted her marriage to work. No it was not perfect in any way but she still wanted to make it last.

As she flopped down on their marital bed her thoughts drifted back to a long time ago. They were both young and energetic. They had big ambitions. And they had love. Prava and Ranit were madly in love when they got married. When Ranit got an opportunity to move abroad Prava was extremely supportive about it. She willfully gave up her high flying career and followed her husband in search of new life.

“I’ll find something to do there,” she told herself happily. “Being with him is the most important thing for me.”

However it turned out to be very difficult for Prava to find a job that did justice to her qualifications. She even tried to explore her long buried hobby of painting expecting to take it somewhere phenomenal but “the struggling painter” phase never seemed to end. 

With the passing years Prava’s smiles started to rearrange themselves into a perpetual frown. Her unspent energy went into cooking and Ranit felt pleasantly surprised to notice the upgrade in Prava’s culinary skills. He had always let Prava choose their way of life and he simply had no clue about his wife’s inner turmoil.

This went on for a few years. For Ranit work paid well, wife cooked well and travelling the picturesque countries suited him well. Prava on the other hand went on struggling to accept the role of the dependent rich wife.

At this juncture people from their families decided to remind them about the ticking clock. They were told to plan for a baby at the earliest. Prava would have definitely decided to have a baby had people not told her to do so. Her already depressed soul took it as an insult and decided to postpone the step indefinitely.

Ranit was crestfallen when he heard about her decision. He had hoped that Prava would be glad to utilize her career break to raise a baby but it was not meant to be. His wife was now firm in her resolve. She had to reinstate herself as an independent career woman first. Motherhood can wait.

At her behest Ranit grudgingly moved back to India. It would be easier to restart her career in her home country, Prava thought with a heart full of hope. Her decision was not entirely wrong. She did get a job within a month’s time but she when she found out that her reporting manager was younger than her by almost a decade she quietly resigned making up silly excuses.

And that’s when Prava completely gave up looking for a job. Life went on as before but perhaps she had also given up on life as well.

Their families had gotten tired of prodding them for a baby. They had been finally accepted as a rich and happy couple who did not need a baby to complete their world.

At such a point of time one fine day Prava saw a stray dog outside the complex gate cuddling her litter. And the scene did what human words had failed to do. She started to long for the touch of her own infant. After a few days she hesitantly had brought up the topic to Ranit. To her surprise he was overjoyed. After a long time they stayed up all night planning for the future. They already felt excited to imagine the happiness a baby would bring into their life.

But the joy was short lived. After months of futile attempts in getting pregnant they decided to consult the doctors. Their worst fear was confirmed. They were not capable of having a biological child.

 Life again came to a lull. Prava cried herself to sleep on almost every night and Ranit could not find the words to console her or his own saddened heart. Time does not really heal any pain; it just teaches you to handle it better. And with the passage of time Prava decided to adopt a child to fill in the emptiness.

Ranit had always given in to his wife’s wishes but this time he said a no.

“I’d not be able to love the child as my own. It wouldn’t be fair to the baby. I’m sorry.”

Prava could not let go of the idea. Ranit had his work to keep him busy. But within the solitary confinement of her plush home Prava felt like the poorest person in the whole world and she longed more and more for a little baby.

And that’s how distance started to creep into their marriage. Every day Prava looked at Ranit with hope that he would change his mind. And every day Ranit had to find out ways to ignore her silent pleas. Slowly Prava became more and more resentful of Ranit’s inflexible stance. And Ranit started to feel that he was made to bear the brunt of Prava’s initial whims.

They lived under the same roof but the gap between their hearts was becoming impossible to bridge.

Prava sighed as she traced the way her happy marriage had come to the present day’s shambles.

She slowly got up from the bed and proceeded to prepare for her cake workshop. Off late she had started to conduct free cooking workshops. Interacting with young people completely clueless about cooking made her think of her happy younger self and it made her feel a little better.

As she mixed the various creams and colours to make the icings her mind again wafted to her husband’s thoughts. Ranit had lately started taking good care of himself. He was looking quite fit and handsome for his age. As Prava looked at her flabby frame in the mirror she felt a feeling of pity flood her senses. There was no way Ranit was doing this to impress his wife. She tried not to imagine the girl who has ensnared her husband’s attention but the more she tried to think about something else the more prominent the image of a tall and svelte doe-eyed girl became in her mind.

Suddenly her phone rang. It was Ranit. He called to say that he would be late and would have dinner outside.

Prava wanted to ask him right away if it was a woman. When they were younger Prava was quite the jealous wife. If she ever caught Ranit checking out another beauty she would start a fight immediately. Prava’r angular eyes, full lips and triangular face gave her a ferocious and feline look that Ranit simply adored. And when she got mad it usually ended up in a night of wild passion. Ranit did not mind his wife’s possessive streak at all…it kept the magic alive in their life he used to think.

Recently Ranit had often made excuses about work to come home late but Prava had never found the courage to confront him. Perhaps she was afraid that he might accept it without any resistance.

Prava and Ranit carried on with their almost broken marriage. Prava often wondered how it would be like if they got divorced. But she realized that she had no life left outside her marriage. Ranit on the other hand would have his career and a brand new love. And she resented him more for destroying her completely.

She decided that she would have to find out proper evidence about his cheating ways. And then she will plan her next move against Ranit.

The next few days went in trying to read Ranit’s text messages or emails. But she had no luck. His phone was biometrically locked and his email id could not be hacked into. She remembered the days when Ranit and she used to share their passwords. But those were the days when Prava never had the need to not trust him.

Prava’s repeated attempts to gather proof were met with failure. She had almost given up on catching him red handed when something happened by fate. Prava had been out of home to get some fresh air. But after a few minutes she started to feel tired and came back from half way.

She was about to enter her home when she could hear Ranit speaking on the phone with someone.

“Yes…I can meet you tomorrow. Which place? Sins Café? Hahaha…nice choice!...Yes I will be there…I’ll make up some excuse…no problem…6:30pm sharp.”

Prava had heard enough…she quickly ran to the lift and went to the community library. She picked up a random magazine and sat down burying her face in it. Surprisingly the tears refused to come out today.  She could only feel a shiver rake her whole body. Till this point of time Prava had hope…may be thin hope but still there was hope. But now that was gone; she had heard Ranit plan out a tryst with her. And now she had to make the decision of when to confront Ranit and what to do about it.

After a long time Prava decided to postpone the decision making bit. She will catch them first.  Then she will slowly decide what to do. She felt a bit stronger and she headed back home.

She found Ranit watching an EPL match with a glass of scotch when she walked in. He was indifferent to her entry in the room. Prava quickly rushed to the kitchen and fried some sausages to go with the scotch.

While tossing the sausages she realized that she loved her mundane routine a lot and the fact that it was about to end made her cry again.

When she handed the plate of starters to Ranit he smiled and murmured a word of thanks.

For a second Prava was happy to see him acknowledge her presence. But her happiness vanished when she realized that it was a smile out of pity and guilt.

“Did you have any serial to watch now? Would you like me to record it for you to watch later on?” Ranit asked.

Prava suppressed her sigh…how little Ranit knew about her daily routine. She had given up watching television a long time ago.

“No…I’ll just rest a bit.” Prava retired into the bedroom.

It was now impossible to not cry. At dinner Ranit noticed that Prava’s eyes were red and asked her casually if she was well.

“I’m a bit feverish.”

“You should visit the doctor tomorrow. May be at Arogya Institute? Shall I make an appointment for you?” Ranit sounded enthusiastic.

Prava knew the reason. Arogya Insitute was located far away from Sins Café.

“I’ll do it myself. Would you be able to pick me up from there at 10pm or so?”

“Sure.” Ranit agreed immediately.

The next day Prava woke up energetic. Perhaps the clear conclusion in sight gave her strength. Or perhaps the lack of recent excitement made her get worked up at the sudden twist of fate.

Prava entered Sins Café at 5pm. She found a corner facing the kitchen and decided to wait there.

At 6:35pm Ranit walked in. And he was not alone.

To her surprise Prava saw him walking in with a young man.

Ranit’s companion was dressed casually in a tee shirt and jeans. He had a strong build and a nice face. It was impossible to detect from his appearance that he was gay.

“He is trying too hard to look like a heterosexual,” Prava thought.

Then her eyes shifted to her husband. Her husband of 9 years; her friend of 15 years. All these years with him and she had no clue about him being bisexual.

Prava saw the excitement in Ranit’s eyes and it felt like a rude stab.

Suddenly emboldened by the incident Prava got up.

She walked briskly and parked herself in front of their table. Both the men looked up. Both of them looked shocked and scared. The air stunk of naked guilt.

“Sorry Prava madam,” the young man stupidly apologized.

“Shut up. You speak up…Ranit,” Prava felt herself coil up in anger.

“I’m extremely sorry Prava. I think it all happened because our marriage was slipping away from our grip…fast…very fast.”

“So you decided to sleep with this man? How can he help you to strengthen the grip? Tell me? Tell me all the lurid details…I want to know!!!”

A few people looked up from the adjacent tables. The cafe manager came up and politely asked them to maintain decorum or leave. The decision was easy.

All three of them were soon outside fuming over different reasons.

“I did not sleep with your husband.” The young man quickly clarified.

“You were intending to.” Prava was sure.

“I am not gay and I have a girlfriend to vouch for it.” The man spoke up in his defense.

“Prava will you stop making a fool of yourself. Sorry Neel. I’m sorry about what happened just now.”

“Oh..to him you can apologize so easily?”

“Prava we are not in a relationship. I’m not gay. Neel is not gay. Period.”

“He is not? Then is he a pimp? Look I know that you are having an affair behind my back. Don’t try to hide things from me any longer.” Prava was confused and angry at the same time.

“Just tell her the truth sir,” the young man was now red with embarrassment.

“Well Prava…Neel is actually a spy. I hired him.”

“A spy? Are you involved with some top secret work? Some classified alien project?” Prava was sarcastic.

“Prava please... I hired him to spy on you. I thought you are cheating on me.”

“What? But why? Why would I cheat on you? You are the guilty one!”

“I have seen questionable creams and desserts hidden in your cupboards. I thought that you were making something to surprise me in a kinky way some night. But obviously they were for someone else because you never offered those to me. ”

“They are for my cooking workshops.”

“Your what? See how far you have moved on from me. I don’t even know what you do these days.”

“You never cared to find out. I spend most of my days cooking for you.”

“Another attempt at overcompensating for cheating on me. ” Ranit was confident.

“I am not cheating on you. What did this guy find out? He should be able to tell you what I was really up to.” Prava looked towards Neel for the first time with some respect.

But Neel lost his chance of making his mark.

“I didn’t really find anything against her. Here is the file containing the information I stole about madam. But I don’t know about any cooking class or workshop.”

Prava sighed and requested Neel to leave.

“Can you please sign on this and write a good review?” Neel held out a printed form.

“But you failed to do anything good!” Ranit protested.

“You don’t have to pay me. I have a day job…I do this as a hobby. The good review will make me happy.” Neel looked at them expectantly.

Suddenly his small eyes looked like those of the puppies that Prava had seen through her window and she promptly wrote a raving review and signed it.

Neel profusely thanked them and left after wishing them good luck.

“So Prava…where is your alibi?” Ranit asked once Neel had left.

“What?”

“You now know that I was not cheating on you. How will you prove the same to me?”

Taken aback Prava was quiet for a while. Then she resolutely said, “Let’s go to the club where I conduct the workshops. That will clarify the matter.”

As she started to walk Ranit held her hand and pulled her back.

“Let’s go to the doctor first…your fever is the only thing that is not fake today.”

By the time they managed to drive back home it was late in the night.

Driving in the lonely road Prava and Ranit were both reminded of the long drives in their initial days.

“You know Prava…all these months I had only one thought running through my head.”

Prava looked at her husband feeling a bit unsettled.

“I kept thinking that I would have changed my mind regarding adoption had you not decided to betray my trust and have an affair.”

Prava instantly broke into a happy smile and let out a deep sigh as she rested her head on Ranit’s shoulders.

That night they both slept well after a long time. The next day will bring a new beginning.

The Woman: Part 4

Love me when I am droopy and down,

Look and love me beyond my frown.

Break down those huge walls of pretense,

And dare to love me despite the ominous silence.

Love me when I am ugly and a total mess,

And be my Sun in the days of my darkness.

Help me to heal when I am drowned in pain;

Give me the strength when my spirit is broken.

Happily ever after is not a single step final;

May be no one told you but love is conditional.

There would be days when I am depressed and alone;

And you cannot leave me to manage on my own.

Yes, I am complex and you have to deal with it,

Be the one and find the courage and grit.

If this feels like work then please leave me,

Much happier I would feel when I am free.

Because when I am at my best with me the world is smiling,

And your company I will not be missing.

Behind the Mask

Minnie had met Soham online in one of the many communities which they had both randomly subscribed to. Soham’s display picture was half a face but that was good enough to get Minnie’s attention. Minnie at that time was quite a young girl in her late teens. It is that age when a girl wishes to claim herself as a woman. It is only after one more decade that she desperately tries to revert back to girlhood.

There were many boys in the same community who hankered for Minnie’s attention but she knew that if Soham did not show any effort to impress her soon she was leaving the community. Such steps did not have to be taken. Soon a debate started regarding which IPL team was going to win the current season. And Soham simply had to notice Minnie from the way she dominated the thread. It is not that girls do not watch sports. They do. But Minnie’s comments were not just passionate blabbering…she argued with logic and statistics. Soham was deeply impressed with her cricketing knowledge; clueless that they were aimed to impress him only. Moreover her profile picture was confusing; Soham could not decide if she was being coy or seductive. And he had to find that out.

Soon they started to join the same threads of discussion. It was obvious that they were just using the pretext to interact with each other. After a respectable period of time when Soham felt that he would not longer be marked as a “despo” if he sent Minnie a friend request, he did so.

“What took you so long!!!” Minnie heaved a sigh of relief as she accepted the request. The first 15 minutes were completely quiet. Both of them were poring over each other’s albums and bio data to satiate their curiosity.

Both were satisfied with what they saw. Minnie looked effortlessly pretty and the absence of pouty selfies in her album made Soham like her even more.

Minnie on the other hand was glad to verify his pictures from all angles and decide that he was indeed the classically handsome person she had chosen at first glance.

Their presence at the communities diminished as they now spent every precious moment absorbed in personal late night chats. The scent of love can turn a teenager’s world upside down and consequently Minnie’s studies, friends and favourite IPL started to feel her neglect.

Her friends kind of figured it out from some very open exchanges in her online profile that Minnie had fallen for this insanely handsome Soham. When they confronted her she only gave a deep blush and a very Mona Lisa smile as a response. They teased her more about Soham and Minnie never let her friends realize that those minutes of getting wordily linked with Soham felt quite heavenly to her.

Minnie came from a conservative family where she was considered to be under the permissible age for dating. But the rules were vague about online dating. So Minnie happily continued her reverie with Soham. Minnie’s elder brother had left home for a job a few months back and this made it much easier to use the internet connection as per her need without having to bother about any prying eyes.

The connection that she felt with Soham felt very real despite the virtual nature of their conversations. All the little rebellious thoughts that her family had taught her to suppress now found validation in Soham. And he seemed to be a piece of her own non-conformist soul.

Their online relationship went on for several months and Minnie started to feel that they should now upgrade and meet in person. Though they had shared tons of pictures yet they had never even had a video chat through the internet. She decided to consult her best friend Renuka regarding the idea before talking to Soham about it.

Instead Renuka came up to Minnie the next day and said she had something urgent to tell Minnie about Soham.

“Can you read my mind?” Minnie laughed happily.

Renuka looked serious.

“Come with me. I’ll tell you at home,” Renuka said as she dragged Minnie by her hands.

“Tell me what? Give me a clue…” Minnie pressed on but Renuka kept silent till they reached her home.

Renuka entered her room and started her laptop. Soon she logged on to a matrimonial site and clicked a profile id. Soham’s face showed up.

Minnie was too shocked to comment.

“Your boyfriend is not a good person,” Renuka made a short and firm statement.

“But…but he is Soham…this guy’s name is Debarun….so…”

“They are not lookalikes Minnie. These are the exact same pictures that you have shown me. It’s same person. Plus that is not the whole thing.”

Minnie was not sure about what could be “the whole thing”.

Renuka kept on typing and opened a few more profiles with the same set of pictures. The names were all different. The pictures belonged to an unidentified person who probably was unaware of the way his pictures were being misused.

Minnie felt faint when she realized how she had been duped by a nameless, faceless stranger.

“This should be reported to the police.” Renuka sounded determined as she held Minnie’s hands.

“No…my parents will be so ashamed of me,” Minnie protested immediately.

“I will go with you and help you through the ordeal,” Renuka promised.

Minnie thought of the intimate nature of the chat sessions that she had had with Soham and protested again.

“Please Renuka…I feel dizzy…please do not talk about police.”

So it was decided after 1 hour of crying and consolations that Minnie will delete her online account. She will not have online presence for a few months and then she will join back with a new account. They will call it a social network detox and no one will guess a thing.

Turned out that no one at Minnie’s home could really guess the incident. The spike in Minnie’s interest in studies was really well received by her parents. But when she was alone at night she felt spooked and vulnerable. For the first time she missed the presence of her strict brother. This would have never happened under his watchful eyes and suddenly she cried a bit thinking how disappointed her brother would be if he knew that his little sister had grown up to be this stupid.

Minnie lived in fear for several weeks worrying about the ways in which Soham might retaliate. Renuka and all the other girls who knew about Soham had blocked him already. Now they waited in fear for the backlash. But it never happened. Weeks rolled into months but no one got to hear anything from Soham.

“He must have found a new target,” Minnie decided as she heaved out a sigh.

As time passed on Minnie went to college from school and then she joined work at the same company where her brother had gotten his first break. She had finally been able to make her family proud of her. The sorry little incident from a long time ago was quickly forgotten.

Minnie went on to fall in love with a wonderful guy. It was a smooth and meaningful relationship and everyone expected them to end up married one day. But things do not always happen as per expectations. Minnie went on to break up with the guy suddenly after a happy 5.5 years of togetherness.

After her break-up Minnie went back to her favourite books to seek refuge. It was just another day in the mall near her home. She was enjoying the pleasant combination of coffee and Jeffrey Archer when something very strange happened.

She had read an exceptionally witty twist in the plot and looked at a distance absently to munch on the thought for a while. Suddenly she realized that her eyes were resting at a very familiar face, the face of Soham. She zapped out of her Archer induced day dream and felt very self conscious.

The next 5 seconds were the most confusing 5 seconds of Minnie’s life. She felt sheer horror for the first 2.5 seconds to spot her perpetrator and then in the next 2.5 seconds it completely dissolved to nonchalance realizing that her online boyfriend was someone else who just happened to use this guy’s pictures.

The real owner of the face was sitting with a couple of friends and seemed to be deeply absorbed in cheerful banter.

Minnie stared at his square cut jaws, his perfect nose and his sleep deprived eyes and smiled to herself. She understood why she had been so naïve 10 years ago…even today she felt tremors within herself just by looking at him. Since this guy seemed to be busy Minnie decided to treat her eyes for some more time. After all this is the face that she had fallen in love with many years ago.

Unpredictably the guy suddenly looked towards Minnie and saw her staring at him with her head slightly tilted and held up by folded hands; her half smile and wide eyes giving an oddly smitten expression. Minnie immediately looked away but he had seen enough. He got up and started to walk towards her.

Minnie blushed to the deepest shades of red and started to scan her mental database of excuses but in vain.

 “Minnie!!! Aren’t you Minnie?” Surprisingly the guy addressed her by her correct name.

“Yes…but how…how…how did you know my name?” Minnie fumbled out with much effort.

“Oh come on…I am Soham. Don’t tell me you didn’t recognize me. I have aged a bit unlike you but it is still possible to make it out.”

The guy casually dragged a chair and sat beside her. He turned around to look at his friends and signaled them to carry on without him. They looked back with raised eyebrows and after taking a long look at Minnie decided to allow them the requested privacy.

“So…didn’t expect to see you in person ever,” said the guy before Minnie could say anything.

Minnie was now in a trance. Had she been more confident about her running skills she would have ran out of this situation but the athletic build of Soham made her feel that it was not possible to outrun him.

“So you are Soham?”

“Yes. Come on Minnie. You couldn’t have forgotten everything.

Do you know how bad it felt when you suddenly deleted your account? I felt depressed for months. 

Your friends too could not be contacted. Then as time passed my pain healed. I had made up my own explanation.”

“What explanation did you make up?” Minnie started to regain normalcy.

“I don’t want to say,” Soham said.

“Please tell me. It happened a long time ago. Let out the harshness…I won’t mind.” Minnie pressed on.

“No, you have to tell me what really happened. Why did you suddenly leave? And why were you checking me out so eerily after 9-10 long years!!!”

“Are you really Soham?” Minnie asked again.

At this point Soham took out an identity card and showed his name.

“Hmmm…well you do not know this probably…but around the same time when you and I were…were…”

“You and I were virtual-dating…now proceed.” Soham smiled.

Minnie returned the smile and felt a bit confident.

“I saw many profiles in a matrimonial site with your pictures. I assumed you to be a fraud. I had no idea that I had been talking to the real Soham and that the rest were fake.”

Minnie paused a bit and then added, “Or did you create the profiles for yourself?”

Soham laughed out aloud.

“I was 20 back then…I was not thinking of marriage Minnie. And honestly I just got to know that my pictures had been misused to this degree. I did catch a few fake profiles in Facebook which were using my pictures and I got them blocked subsequently. Being a guy I never gave it much thought. A guy is not prone to much risk…they say. Turns out they are very wrong! ”

“I am sorry Soham. I felt very nervous when I saw the other profiles. I just was trying to protect myself and my reputation.”

There was silence for sometime.

“What about you? What did you think happened to me?” Minnie asked.

“I was crushed when you left without any reason.” Soham was brief.

“Yes…but what did you believe the cause to be? That I was a cheap flirt with other motives?”

“No…your innocent face didn’t suit that angle…at least it didn’t occur to me. I though you must have died…Sorry. It seemed to be the only explanation that didn’t make me revolt at the thought of falling for you.”

“You killed me?” Minnie was clearly offended.

“I know it’s kind of extreme but I wished to preserve that perfect memory of you.”

Again they paused for a long while; each looking at different directions allowing the huge volume of information to sink in.

“So…” Both started at the same time.

It was obvious that they still felt attracted to each other.

“Here is my number. I will leave the decision making bit to you. If you ask me I’d say we should catch up from where we had left it off…if you’re single that is. I am.” Soham wrote his number in a piece of paper and handed it over to Minnie.

Minnie calmly put it inside her bag but not before memorising the number. This time she had no intention to end things abruptly with Soham.

That day none of them could sleep well. Soham was unhappy that he had not shaved and that his hair was unruly when Minnie saw him in person. He was sour about the first impression that he had created on her.  Minnie too was worried that her appearance might not be good enough for Soham. 

She was almost without make up and was dressed in over sized comfortable clothes. After all it was supposed to be a date with Jeffrey Archer and she was not planning to impress him.

If they both knew how insecure they had made the other one, they would have felt a lot more secure about their own appearances.

Anyway Minnie did call him and soon they started meeting often. It turned out that they worked close to each other though their actual residences were far apart. They met sometimes over lunch, sometimes over coffee and sometimes on holidays defying the long commute separating them.

Among the things that they resumed from the past was the game of rhyming lines. Minnie started a line and Soham had to come up with an answer in a rhyming line. It was juvenile and in its simplicity lay the foundation of their bond. A genuine bond of merriment and laughter without much expectations.

“Do you know Soham how many people I have tried to play this game with? How much I wished to recreate the spontaneous fun that I had with you? But each time I failed to recreate the magic.”

Soham smiled as he stared at Minnie. Her layered hair framed her pretty face well and looking at her he could solve the puzzle that had kept him awake many a nights. She was certainly not a coy girl…the smoldering feminine grace in Minnie made Soham feel high in her company…no alcohol was needed.

“I used to stalk your profile and read everything on your page written by other boys. I was unbelievably possessive about you.” Soham confessed.

“Really? Then I must tell you about my past before it gets too complicated. I had a relationship in between. We were quite serious and even were expecting to get married. I hope it wouldn’t trigger any jealousy in you.” Minnie decided to divulge everything.

“Oh no…don’t get me wrong. I understand that…I’m saying that I was possessive back then. I am not expecting you to have saved yourself for me! Past is over…I am interested in the future. Even I am not a virgin.” Soham attempted to make Minnie feel relaxed.

“What? You are not?” Minnie seemed to be stunned.

“No…come on. I’m not bothered about what happened in these 10 years. Let’s plan for the coming days…”

“I said I was in a serious relationship but I have not been physically intimate with him. Are you really telling me you have experienced it?” Minnie was still in shock.

“Well…I was in a brief relationship. It lasted for a few months but yes we got physical and I cannot deny that. How does it matter Minnie? Why harp on what has happened in the past?”

“It matters a lot! I have not experienced it because physical intimacy creates huge mental baggage and I didn’t want to trudge it along all my life.”

“But you did love him…how much time have you two been together?”

“5.5 years.”

“Whoa! I think that creates more attachment than a brief spell of 6-7 months. We have to let go of the past…”

“I can but you cannot.” Minnie was still sulking.

“Why are you deciding things for me? This is not a competition Minnie. I don’t have any attachment with my ex. We are not even in touch. Are you?”

“Who’s competing now? ” Minnie looked a bit crazy now.

“Don’t get worked up. I’m just trying to make you see sense.”

“I’m not in touch with him either.”

The mood had changed completely. After a few more lame attempts to ease out the tension Soham decided that it would be better if they both left for home and took some time to ponder over the situation. Perhaps time would drill some sense into his stubborn girl Minnie.

But it did not. Minnie and Soham tried to talk and feel the same happiness that they had always associated with their conversations but it was not the same any more. The connection was broken and it bothered both of them.

“Minnie…what do you think about the situation?” Soham asked at last.

“I have thought about it several times but I can’t really get past my mental block. I’d feel unreasonably jealous of the girl who got you first and things won’t be fair perhaps…”

“You are breaking up with me?” Soham was shocked.

“I have always envisaged us as something beyond the real world of flaws. Earlier also things felt perfect till we suddenly went different ways. And now also things seemed to be too good until we hit this sudden block. Perhaps ours is a relationship that is not meant to be? Perhaps you would be my one precious memory whom I’ll always recount in future whenever I have a fight with my actual husband?” Minnie tried to offer her viewpoint.

“Oh…so you have mentally moved on to a future husband also?” Soham had decided to be calm today but it was no longer possible.

“Clearly there is no point in me trying to mend this situation…after all I can’t mend myself and become a virgin for you. Goodbye Minnie. Be happy.” Soham stormed out without listening to the feeble pleas of Minnie.

Minnie sat back in despair as she evaluated the incident. She swayed between calling Soham to apologize and moving on from that point. Eventually she decided to not call him. She had spoken the truth and nothing can alter it now. Had she called Soham she would have realized that he had blocked her already.

They went along separate paths in life and did not run into each other for a long time. Deep down Minnie was hoping for an encounter after 10 more years. Being a lover of fiction it had become her habit to expect drama from her real life as well. Nevertheless fate brought them face to face after 2.5 years only.

Soham was strolling casually at a mall when he spotted her...actually them. Minnie walked into the same place with a guy who seemed to be either her husband or her fiancé. The guy was less than average in looks. Soham assumed that he must be intelligent because he clearly needed something to compensate for his appearance. Soham quickly left the store through the other entrance.

But after an hour at the mall it happened that Minnie bumped into Soham in the lift. She was alone. For a second time seemed to have stopped. Then Minnie smiled, that warm smile which speaks of genuine happiness. Soham had decided to be firm with her but he could feel his lips curling themselves into the biggest possible smile…betraying him completely.

“How are you Soham?” Minnie sounded joyful.

“I’m good and I see that you too are doing great!” Soham replied.

“How do you know? Don’t assume…I’m not doing that great.” Minnie was a tad nervous, she was talking too fast today.

“I missed you Soham; may be we should stay in touch…just as friends.”

“No. We shouldn’t. I wish you well and I think we should keep it to that only.” Soham grew firm finally and started to walk away.

Minnie felt awkward as she stared after him.

“I hope you know that he is a virgin because he isn’t hot enough to get a girl.” Soham stopped suddenly, turned around and made a remark.

 “Who?”

“Your husband…fiance…whatever. I saw you with him earlier today. I’m sorry about my comment…I’ll leave now.” Soham’s face was red but it was impossible to figure out if it was from fury or embarrassment.

“He is nothing to me…yet. We have been set up by our parents and hence we are trying to interact and see if it goes anywhere.” Minnie clarified the situation. “And why do you care so much? Are you not in a relationship yet?”

Minnie’s words came out all wrong. She was actually betting her hopes on Soham being still available but it sounded more like sarcasm when she spoke.

“Oh yes…you see there are no takers for used men these days.” Soham could not stop himself from being bitter.

“I’m sorry for everything Soham…but I have missed you terribly. Can we just be friends again? Please?” Minnie begged desperately.

Soham took out his phone and unblocked Minnie’s number in front of her.

“My phone number is still the same,” he said as he left.

Now Minnie was in a position that left her more messed up than ever. She was getting along well in her life and was trying to settle down in marriage. In the story of her life she had already allocated for Soham the role of the one that got away and the one who would haunt her sometimes in her married future. The role of her husband had not been yet given to anyone in particular but Minnie had already toned down her expectations to match any mild mannered average guy who can be controlled easily.

But today the chance meeting sent the perfect plot of her life awry. She now wished to have Soham and not just for one day…for life. It was supposed to happen after her yet-to-happen marriage went limpid in future but fate refused to let Minnie write her own story. After spending a jittery 24 hours Minnie called Soham and asked him out.

“I really had no wish to see you Minnie. I just came because I didn’t want to be rude.” Soham made his stance clear when they met.

“Please don’t sound so cold. IPL season is starting again. Can’t we just forget everything for a while and revisit our initial days of innocence together?”

“What do you mean?”

“I have purchased tickets for this Sunday’s match. Let’s visit the stadium once today. I know a friend who works there and we will be allowed to go on field.”

Minnie was talking fast again. She was not even waiting for Soham’s answers. As she booked the cab to the stadium Soham felt that he was wasting his time.

“A woman who never can look beyond her myopic demands,” he sadly thought as he saw Minnie happily collect herself into the cab.

Once they entered the cricket stadium the situation was different. Soham too felt the high adrenaline of the place where their favourite team had won the tournament in the previous season.

Soon they both got busy in cricketing talks and it seemed like they had never been apart since their online dates.

Soham was looking up at the sky and already wondering if Sunday would be a bright day too when Minnie went down on her knees.

“Will you be mine?” she sweetly extended a red rose towards Soham.

Defying his machismo Soham’s fair cheeks turned deep red.

“Are you crazy Minnie?” he said as he helped her to get up and slowly dragged her out of the stadium.

“Yes…for you. Please say you are mine…”

“No.”

Minnie stopped in her steps. “I won’t leave if you say no.” she was adamant.

“Look you are mentally unstable. Let’s get out of here before they get you to an asylum.”

“So you take me to your home instead…please Soham.” Minnie kept on begging.

They talked on for hours but both of them realized that beyond their anger, resentment and jealousy they had managed to hold on to the love for each other.

“Minnie I truly love you…in these few years I have not even tried to date. But you scare me. Look at you…you were trying hard to settle down. You have hurt me before and I feel that you might leave me again…” Soham confessed.

“Then marry me and anchor me down by a binding contract.”

“Oh…really? So it no longer matters to you that I’ve been physically intimate before?”

“What hurts me is the fact that you are not a virgin and I am.” Minnie said. “Why can’t you make the scores even and take me to your side tonight?”

Minnie sounded drunk but Soham knew that she was completely sober.

She had that same wide eyed expression on her face. Soham realized that she indeed loved him…may be in a way that was very different. But may be it did not matter.

Soham and Minnie decided after a very long evening and a very long night that they will give things another shot. For several days they focused on enjoying the present. And then when Soham felt that Minnie’s crazy quotient was at an all time low he brought up his apprehensions.

“I feel that you are playing me. You’ll leave me at your convenience if and when you can.”

“Soham I proposed marriage to you. You’re the one who cleverly skirted the question. I should be insecure here.”

“But even if we marry…what about your pre defined ideas? You said you’d wish to remember me when you fight with your husband…if I become the husband I’ll always feel that you’ve given my fantasy role away to your ex. I don’t want that.”

“So which role do you want? That of the husband or that of the fantasy?”

“I don’t know. And I don’t like the way you confuse me.”

“You can have both. You and I can marry and be serious from now on. But I have 2 previous versions of you as my fantasy. My online boyfriend Soham and the familiar stranger Soham at the mall.”

Minnie was smiling confidently but Soham felt controlled and manipulated in front of this woman. Soham really had no plans to get married so fast but he knew he could not risk to leave Minnie officially unmarried and available to others. He thought a lot and decided to do what made him the happiest.

They got married after 2 more months.

“Perhaps I am a television who was looking for his remote,” Soham happily thought as he exchanged garlands with Minnie.