The secret to happiness is selfishness

Now before you shake your head in dissent answer the following questions.

1.       Are you a happy person?

2.       Are you happy right now?

3.       Have you been happy at any point of time?

If your answer is no to all the questions you need immediate psychiatric help...glad that you are reading my blog even in such delicate mental health...but you should first book yourself an appointment with a therapist.

If your answer is yes to at least one of the questions...at the point of time when you were happy there have been several people at different parts of the earth who were suffering from the worst forms of mental/physical pain...but that did not bother you because you  are by definition a selfish person. Accept it...we all are selfish to some extent. If we cannot dissociate ourselves from the sufferings of other people we would feel overwhelmed with grief...all the time.

But how selfish are we? We will get to that but let us take a look at a law first:

The Law: The product of the number of people we care for and the intensity of our caring is a constant.

Some care for the entire world...they see people suffer...it bothers them...they renounce domestic life and devote their time for the betterment of society. But...they do not feel all consuming love/affection for any one in the world.

Application of law: Number is very high...intensity is very less.

Some care for a huge group of people but of course superficially.

Application of law: Number is high...intensity is less.

Some care for a select set of people...with pure devotion.

Application of law: Number is very less...intensity is very high.

Some care for only 1 person...self-love. Let every one around suffer to make this person happy...yet he/she would not be bothered as long his/her happiness is not compromised.

Application of law: Number being 1 intensity is decadently high.

PS: Apologies for the sermonic undertones...but let’s not call people selfish any more.  

The narcissist’s dilemma

First take the test and find out whether or not you are a narcissist.

Test: You are in front of a glass pane that is reflecting some light forming your image and transmitting some light letting you see the person standing on the other side. The person on the other side is exquisitely handsome/pretty.

Now who would you rather check out? The other person or your own image?

Yes…you are a narcissist if you have opted to ogle at yourself.

Now about the dilemma…

The narcissist faces the ultimate dilemma when he or she is told about their resemblance with another person. The narcissist will take a good look at this person.

And then look at the different pictures of him/her again and again trying to decide who looks better.

Now if this person looks better than the narcissist he/she would be upset because it proves that a better looking version of himself/herself exists in this world.

And if the person looks worse than the narcissist he/she would be upset because it triggers the disturbing thought that another person has found this ugly person similar looking.

And thus after suffering from prolonged mental anguish the narcissist finally looks into the mirror…one place that never fails to provide solace…takes a deep reassuring sigh…tosses out the pictures of the lookalike and declares with conviction, “I’m always the best.”