Flexibility is overhyped

We were all born as wonderful human beings with vibrant traits that could have lit up the world…but there are 2 types of influences ruining the genuineness in us and making us dull and commonplace.

Type 1: Involuntary interference

Throughout our lives we imbibe characteristics of people around us. A day comes when our individual personalities are diluted to the extent that we become a conglomeration of all the people that we have interacted with.

If we recall our earliest memories we can remember how we had inimitable traits which were spoiled by regular interference.

Type 2: Voluntary interference

Throughout our lives people around us often try to manipulate our decisions. Our individuality gets severely mutilated in such cases.

A few common instances:

Childhood: Parents take the liberty to make our decisions.

Teenage: A dominant friend might influence us into ventures we don’t like.

Youth: Manager trashes our career aspirations.

Marriage: New people might impose their decisions.

Social circle: Narcissists might expect compliance to their standards.

The problem is when people politely say that altering a certain trait would make us better they think they are doing us a favour but they  directly imply that we are unacceptable with our existing traits. And no one loves to hear bad things about themselves…it erodes our self esteem very fast.

We need to be firm about the 2^nd type of interference. It is our life and we entitled to our own whims. Complying with other’s whims might earn us the “good boy” / “good girl” tag but the tag comes at the cost of our happiness.

Also there is a graver damage done to the society by our spineless behaviour. We fall into the vicious adapt-imbibe-impose cycle. It is our life and if we do not live it according to our wishes some day we too run the risk of becoming a dominant parent, a roguish boss or an awful in-law.

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We often confuse free thinking people with selfish people but freedom is a very basic human right and it’s not an optional right.

There is a common trend of asking people “While taking a decision are you a brain person or a heart person?”

Doesn’t matter whether the decision is coming from heart or from brain…as long the decision is coming from YOUR heart or from YOUR brain.